God, or whomever is listening out there in the cosmos. I, who am usually so perfectly in control when in public, am on the verge of breaking down and weeping on my keyboard. The past is crap, I hate it. It keeps on reaching forth with its ghostly arms to encircle the present and shut me out. All I want to do is disable the cmdPREVIOUS command button if only there were one, better yet i'd delete it permanently. Blood ties, voluntary ties, all kinds of ties are so f-ing overrated (fuck censorship... the f-word deserves its place in the fucked up schema of life). Sometimes life doesn't seem worth enduring, and I just want to barf out what's left of my fucked up soul.